About the author

My ‘Smithstory.’ (Unabridged.)

It’s supposed to be like ‘history.’ Or maybe ‘mystery.’ I don’t know. It sounded like a good idea in my head. What follows is a bit more about me; my turbulent but seemingly typical life as someone with grandiose dreams and a wavering means to achieve them.

Hi there. I’m Todd. Here’s what I look like + cat:


UPDATE ⚠️ Who I am now (2019):

I rather enjoy what I originally wrote here, so I’ve decided to keep it (below), even though some things are outdated. That’s where this update comes in. Pretty clever, right?

Not really.

I’m 28 now. I live in Seattle, and I’m missing Buffalo when I never thought I would. I’m a bit less high on life, I’m lost, a tad cynical, questioning, reevaluating, and I’ve lowered my rose-colored glasses. (I haven’t completely taken them off; they’re sitting at a slightly lower position on the bridge of my nose now.)

BUT. Along with that, I’ve grown, I’ve experienced, I’ve pushed myself. And that was my goal. I’m still trying to find my feet, and normalize my life out here in the Pacific Northwest. I’m not sure if this is the place for me, but I think it might be too soon to tell. I’ll let you know. And now that I’ve experienced the discomforts of not home, I’m wondering if ‘home’ has always been less about the setting, and more about the people. That’s what I miss most, and my heart continues to tug me in all kinds of directions.

At the end of the day, I’m alive. The choice is mine. My life is mine, and this comforts me. But don’t worry; tinged with just a skosh more seriousness, I’m still just as sarcastic and dry as ever. It’s my coping mechanism of choice.

Thank you for coming to my ToddTalk.

Who I was at this blog’s conception (2014):

I’m a 23 year-old openly homosapien from Western New York. I have aspirations to be a professional guacamole taster, but I’ve nearly come to terms with the fact that that’s unlikely. My more pragmatic dream is to have dual careers as a musical artist and author. I think though that I’m somehow closer to accomplishing the former, less realistic goal.

I wasted a lot of time after high school by believing in that ludicrous societal concept that you’re actually supposed to know which career path you’d like to take at eighteen. I had no idea what I was doing, so I did what any sensibly naive post-grad teen would do, and I moved to New York. The concrete jungle where dreams are made of. In short, I did not find my dreams in the scaffolding or the obnoxious traffic. Next.

I moved back home after one academic year to study locally. It saved me a lot of money until I came up with my next bright idea. After a semester home, I decided to move 6 hours upstate to incredibly-rural Potsdam, New York, where I went on to study for a whole month and a half. I then realized that the only reason I wanted to attend SUNY Potsdam was because it was quickly referenced in passing in an episode of Will & Grace. That was in 2011. So again I moved back home, where I have somehow managed to stay put ever since.

I currently languish in Buffalo, New York, where I have a genuinely rewarding job at Trader Joe’s. Every day I meet someone newly inspiring; it has opened my eyes so much more so that I am able to let new light in and see things more progressively than I ever have before. In recent months I have become more open and interested in differing positions, beliefs, cultures, and walks of life.

I have now begun to buckle down and really try to formulate a plan for my future, because driving the same routes to the same places in the same setting is no longer stimulating, and it’s just not cutting it. Je vais m’en sortir. (I’m going to get out of here.) The current course of action which I’m temporarily in tune with is to go back to school yet again, and earn a degree in linguistics.

If you look hard enough, you can find me satiating my hunger for music by writing lyrics and crafting melodies, reading something so enticing that my eyes dry out from a lack of blinking, nose-deep in a good Facebook status and/or tweet, sleeping for an obscene amount of time, and paying the extra dollar at Moe’s for a miniature cup of guac to dip my tortilla chips in.

16 thoughts on “About the author

  1. So I just read that post in which u mentioned you’re in debt. And I wanted to comment but te page disappeared.
    First thing first, woah! You’re so frustrated. You ought to be when you’re in that muh debt. I partially agree with you. I left my studies in between because I couldn’t afford to study. So when I finally got a job and started studying again, I was half as interested in studying. So maybe your father was right. You eventually lose interest. But I also agree that there’s no use in doing a degree you are not passionate about. Why waste so much time studying something you hate or have zero passion for?
    Intially you made it sound like you were some sort of loser. But you have so many talents. You have so many options to choose from. How about something in media? It includes writing and the whole singing and writing thing. You can also talk to a counsellor from your previous college, no? Talking to them might help out a little.
    Of course I really don’t need to say all this. You’ll eventually figure out to do what you want with life. Good luck.
    By the way, thanks so much for calling customer services a hobby, not a career. Gee, thanks!

    1. Thanks so much for the comment. First, I want to apologize if you were offended by my statement about customer service. I didn’t mean to be so broad; what I was trying to get across was that the types of customer service jobs that you aren’t passionate about are the ones that aren’t worth having a career in. Those that challenge your self esteem and don’t pay well enough and in which there’s little or no room to grow within the company. The rest are fine. Again, I’m so sorry if that offended you.

      In listing my hobbies and passions, I was explaining my frustration with not being able to decide which one I wanted to pursue more than the others. Some days, I’m more intensely passionate about music. Others, my writing takes precedence. Lately, I’ve been revisiting the idea of writing screenplays again. It’s all up in the air for the moment. What I really want to do, and have wanted to do for a long time, is record music and tour. I’m actually in the process of comparing studio time costs and seeing where it can lead in terms of a music career.

      Again, thanks so much for your input. Your encouragement really does mean a lot to me.

  2. Hey I was kidding! I deal with assholes on daily basis. It takes a lot to offend me 🙂 uh doesn’t pay well? You get idiotic customers? You just described my job! Haha that’s okay I don’t know why I just love doing what I do but yes eventually I’ll move out.
    The reason you can’t decide what you feel most passionate about is that you’re ummm human. We are all like that. You could try doing small projects and see how it goes. Screenplays could be good too.
    Hey it’s all good! Sorry if I’m being too friendly and sarcastic too fast- I’m awkward like that.

    1. Oh, good, I’m glad you weren’t really offended. 🙂 I just wasn’t sure- sometimes it is hard to tell via text. Well, hey- if you love it, it becomes that much more bearable and enjoyable while you’re still doing it. I give you credit. I have two jobs at the moment and while I genuinely like each one, I’ll eventually grow weary and seek out a change.

      I think your suggestion to try doing some small projects in each field is an excellent idea. I’ve actually got several projects in motion already; sometimes, though, I overwhelm myself and don’t get anything done. 😛

      I love the friendliness and sarcasm; trust me. It’s never too soon for either. I just didn’t pick up on it at first. Also, the awkwardness is welcome- this coming from a fellow awkward penguin.

      1. Glad you found the idea helpful. Oh that’s good. Hahah it’s okay that’s the case with most of us.
        Hahaha I’m glad. Glad I didn’t weird you out 😀

      1. You’re welcome! I’ve found I have a sort of style as well of which makes it so hard to change up my writing.

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